Do you know how to ask for help?
Or are you the oldest sister?
*artist's recreation of a tweet I saw once and forgot to save.
I’m not sure where I learnt it from, but a deep belief that I keep coming up against in my own psyche is that it's GOOD to be independent. That relying on other people or asking for help is somehow shameful or a failure. Big sister syndrome? Being a single mum? That doing IT ALL is the goal and doing it all MYSELF is the standard. When I started Milk & Moon I was terrified that anyone would realise that I had no idea what I was doing. The first big investment in the business I made, a coaching program, was - at its heart - about building confidence. I felt awkward talking about it, as even admitting that I didn’t already have all the things I needed within me made me feel shame.
There’s a much longer blog post coming where I examine this in more detail (spoiler, it’s capitalism at the root!) but suffice to say it took me a long old time to learn that not only is asking for help beneficial - it’s essential. We are not able to do it all alone. We are not made that way.
Asking for help is liberating
It’s been a totally freeing exercise these past few years to be able to admit what I don’t know, to admit where my needs are. I am seeing the results in my business. Now to translate that to my day to day life eh? Milk & Moon may look like a one woman show, but it really only is because this one woman surrounded herself with a whole load of women to lean on and learn from.
So, in case it helps you, in your life or in your business, these are all the people that have supported me in growing Milk & Moon. Some intensely, some personally, some just by putting out the things they sell.
Who can I go to for small biz wisdom?
Leona - Indie Roller Membership Leona has built an amazingly supportive space for small creative businesses. A one-stop-shop for everything from product development to marketing, to seasonal planning to beating the inner critic. If you are starting out on your journey to creative business building, I would start here.
Get help from an SEO genius
Menekse Stewart- SEO and marketing I think I fell a bit in love with Menekse over a zoom call in 2020. SEO was a mystery to me and thanks to her course I have a much better grip on it. She breaks it down in a really accessible way that doesn’t overwhelm. If you found my website before you followed me on instagram we both have Menekse to thank for that.
Ask for expert help with Facebook ads
Amanda Perry - FB ads marketing I won a membership to Amanda’s ecomm growth hub and 3 months coaching with Amanda herself in 2020 - I loved it so much that I now pay to be in the hub as it’s such a great place to find knowledge and support for paid marketing.
Get inspired while growing your Instagram
Lucy Sheridan - Lucy’s Good Gram course was inspiring. Like everyone whose income is tied to their social media content, being able to put together some good strategy that allows space and time to just be ‘me’ and learn a bit how to manage the ups and downs of this weird online world.
Ask for help with your words
Siobhan Strode - If you are reading this at all it’s because Siobhan has held my hand throughout the whole process of getting any type of blog at all online. Solid copywriting support tailored to my needs that is designed to empower me to just get on and do it myself.
Get enthusiastic about your creativity again
Good Ship Illustration - The Fly your freak flag course felt like such a luxury - but really investing into my own sketchbook practice has been an essential part of keeping ideas and creativity flowing.
Who should I ask for goal setting support?
Ruth Poundwhite Ruth’s Gentle email journaling course pulled me out of the lockdown biz despair in 2020, Ruth is all about honouring your own needs and learning to run your own biz in a way that suits you.
There’s nothing wrong with asking for business coaching
Ray Dodd’s first ever biz coaching group course back in 2017 opened up a world of possibility for me and helped me find the confidence I needed. Ray talks about money now and is very very good at it. Deeply thoughtful and feminist through and through.
Ask for help with creating your vision
Gem’s photography at Alpinemoon Gem just gets it. Superbly talented photographer who somehow takes my vague ramblings and turns them into amazing brand photos. I work with her over and over!
The Daughters Of Industry. These are my real life friends. We do events and things together and I may have possibly chucked it all in more than once if it hadn't been for this coven of encouragement and good times face to face.
There ain’t no such thing as a one woman show, and I get to do what I love to do because these women are out there doing what THEY love to do. I can’t get enough of women supporting women! Let me know who has done the same for you in the comments, or come and find me on insta and join the conversation